Chemistry can be a good and bad thing. Chemistry is good when you make love with it. Chemistry is bad when you make crack with it.

I sing seriously to my mom on the phone. To put her to sleep, I have to sing 'Maria' from West Side Story. When I hear her snoring, I hang up.

I immediately said yes for one reason and one reason only....Netflix rhymes with Wet Chicks.

Hanukkah is...the festival of lights, instead of one day of presents, we get eight crazy nights

Alright, remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you.

It's hard to soar with the eagles when you're surrounded by turkeys.

On this lovely, lovely Hanukkah, drink your gin and tonica.

Feels good to try, but playing a father, I'm getting a little older. I see now that I'm taking it more serious and I do want that lifestyle.

Of course, I peed my pants, everyone my age pees their pants. It's the coolest.

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink, put you to bed when youve had too much to drink. Oh, it could be so nice to grow old with you, I wanna grow old with you.

Mama says that, happiness is from magic rays of sunshine that come down when you're feeling blue.

I know my heart will never be the sameBut I'm telling myself I'll be okay

Prepare yourself for success. You have to see it coming to get there.

The deepest feeling always shows itself in silence.

You can design a mortgage system that is different without a Fannie and Freddie, but there are principles you have to have, to have a good system.

We have not long to live in any event. Let us spend what is left in seeking the unpeopled world behind the sunrise.

forget normal, we're going to be extraordinary" -Lucas :)

Your body is your temple. You do your body good, your body will do you good.

Enjoy when you can, and endure when you must.

What good is a writer if he can't destroy literature? And us... what good are we if we don't help as much as we can in that destruction?

I watched the Olympics as a kid. It would be fun to try to win a medal. If I could swap Olympic gold for a US PGA Championship? I'd take the Major every time.