Children in a family are like flowers in a bouquet: there's always one determined to face in an opposite direction from the way the arranger desires.

Trouble like the hill ahead straightens out when you advance upon it.

Parents are often so busy with the physical rearing of children that they miss the glory of parenthood just as the grandeur of the trees is lost when raking leaves.

Happiness is not something you get but something you do.

A bachelor is a man who can take a nap on top of a bedspread.

Weather means more when you have a garden. There's nothing like listening to a shower and thinking how it is soaking in around your green beans.

It is all right to say exactly what you think if you have learned to think exactly.

The way to achieve happiness is to have a high standard for yourself and a medium one for everyone else.

Too often in ironing out trouble someone gets scorched.

No one knows his true character until he has run out of gas, purchased something on the installment plan and raised an adolescent.

Our children await Christmas presents like politicians getting in election returns: there's the Uncle Fred precinct and the Aunt Ruth district still to come in.

Obey the principles without being bound by them.

While enthusiasm may be necessary for great accomplishments elsewhere, on Wall Street it almost invariably leads to disaster

Learning is better worth than houses or land.

Socialism is... not only a way of life, but a certain scientific approach to social and economic problems.

Cooking demands attention, patience, and above all, a respect for the gifts of the earth. It is a form of worship, a way of giving thanks.

Money can buy everything money can buy, which is just a lot of stuff.

It seems to me self-evident that we cannot have capitalism without capital and, very importantly, that the ultimate source of all economic capital is Nature's capital

I separate cartooning, which is fun and wacky and soulful, from illustration, which is very well-drawn and extremely uptight to look at. There's a difference. I'm a cartoonist.

Global warming my gluteus maximus

When death becomes the property of the believer it receives a new name and is called sleep.