Contempt for the things people choose of their own free will is, at its heart, contempt for free will.

We always ask where the time went. We never ask where it's coming from.

I’ll feel that horrible feeling in my stomach you get when you’ve gone over to the Dark Side. But I’ll be fine. That’s the good thing about the Dark Side. Eventually, your eyes adjust.

Genius flames and dies, but amiable competence can live forever.

The newspaper is a lecture. The Web is a conversation.

I don't believe in the very concept of "first thing in the morning." I'm a "third thing in the afternoon" fellow.

Calculus destroys self-esteem on contact.

If Mother had to be told not to shove the entire brick of Ivory up Junior's hindquarters, constipation is the least of his problems.

There are three stages to a man's life. 1. He laughs at Clark Griswold. 2. He sympathizes deeply with Clark Griswold. 3. He laughs at Clark Griswold.

All you need to know about Arafat was that he insisted on wearing a pistol when he addressed the UN General Assembly. And all you need to know about the UN, I suppose, is that they let him.

I want to believe in intelligent design, and hence I am suspicious of anything that seems to confirm my desire to believe.

You cannot become successful all by yourself.

I'm not into clubbing. I want to be known for my work.

The difference between a welfare state and a totalitarian state is a matter of time.

I don't want to live in a bubble, in my craft or in the world... I can't, I would be cheating myself out of my generation and the world we live in.

I like the feeling of being able to confront an experience and resolve it as art.

If you wish to learn swimming you have to go into the water and if you wish to become a problem solver you have to solve problems.

If every day of your life you are told by authority figures that the Earth is flat, you will be scared of falling off the edge whether you want to be or not.

I'm writing for those people in Kenya, but in Irvine and in New York.

I didn't really want to be part of a clique or a niche. But I also was looking for my own voice, as a writer, y'know? And a world I could call my own.

Humankind can tolerate only so much rejection.