Converting liberals is always a great thing. It makes every day worth living.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

some moments are nice, some arenicer, some are even worthwritingabout.

Always grateful, forever blessed.

I was happy with the umpiring in India last year, New Zealand is OK these days, and the only real area of concern is Pakistan. They seem to have a chip on their shoulders about their cricket there.

Wisdom is also a deeper consciousness of ignorance.

I'm an Irish Catholic and I have a long iceberg of guilt.

I don't mind parting with the corn, but not with the field in which it was raised.

Instead of playing the game "Making Life Wonderful", we often play the game called "Who's Right". Do you know that game? It's a game where everybody loses.

I don't believe for one moment you can write well what you wouldn't read for pleasure.

I have made plenty of mistakes. The key to life is to learn from them. I have been a little too introspective, but I think that stemmed from insecurity or shyness. I took a long time to grow up.

The modern majesty consists in work. What a man can do is his greatest ornament, and he always consults his dignity by doing it.