'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.

Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?

Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.

I've never been swimming, and that's because it's never been more than half an hour since I last ate.

I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.

At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota

Hugs are great, but - better than drugs? Come on. Let me put it to you this way: I never drove to Harlem at 4 a.m. to get somebody to hug me.

Well I have a drug history and a public drinking problem and I am not the healthiest guy. So they just ran that I died of a drug overdose.

Who has the courage to set right those misperceptions that bring us love?

Failure doesn't define you. It's what you do after the failure that determines whether you are a leader or a waste of perfectly good air.

Badness is only spoiled goodness.

For me, getting comfortable with being famous was hard - that whole side of it, the loss of anonymity, the loss of privacy. Giving up that part of your life and not having control of it.

There is a place where cerebral an corporeal meet: they call it rowing

If I'm a faggot spell it right, I got way more than two G's

There's not a single chef I know of that does not think about the politics of the food they're serving.

When I'm explaining something to you, if I'm being long-winded, and twisty in a non-productive way, I could make you feel vaguely insulted. And you'd have a right to be.

I don't know why my son was born conservative.

When somebody tells you they're not very smart, they're saying exactly the opposite.