DISCRIMINATE, v.i. To note the particulars in which one person or thing is, if possible, more objectionable than another.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

You're already dead inside. Years of living in Espoo have made you an empty husk of a human being. They don't call their hockey team the "Espoo Blues" for nothing.

Belief and faith are the spiritual soul of every man.

A person who does not know himself... can not commit to another person. Without being genuine to yourself you are unable to be genuine to anyone else.

Obviously the raven with the unquenchable itch was at it again, playing tricks on the world and its creatures. Once by air, he thought, and now by water.

I hope that, somewhere, Mom and Dad are proud that little Walter is performing with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'

Those who remain unmoved by the wind of joy silently follow the Path.

A lot of times what's satisfying to me in comedy is when a woman successfully does self-care.

I extend my appreciation to the associations, movements and all those who defend human life.

Politicians are like the bones of a horse's foreshoulder-not a straight one in it.