Damn the subjunctive. It brings all our writers to shame.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

Matter is but the artificial division of energy.

A single person is missing for you, and the whole world is empty. But one no longer has the right to say so aloud.

A truth that's told with bad intent - beats all the lies you can invent.

The principle of procrastinated rape is said to be the ruling one in all the great bestsellers.

I think all phases of one's career are serious if you take it seriously no matter if you are doing high profile dramatic pieces or not.

Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

I think virgins are far more interesting to write about. If we've been around the block a few times, we know what to expect. Not so with virgins.

As I say, we Norwegians love our woolens, and you can buy some beautiful knitwear in Oslo. They might cost you a bit - but they will last.

Coming out of BYU's football spring, 1999, practice: We might have a chance to be pretty good.

In football, you're taught to react by being aggressive, taught to react with violence. If you can't separate that on the field and off the field, you're going to be in a lot of trouble in your life.