Dealing with jackasses on every front today. Good thing I have tiger blood and Adonis DNA. (Charlie Sheen Reference)

When giving money to the amputated, you must put it directly into their pockets.

The sweetest victories come after the bitterest defeats.

You don't mince words.""Just garlic.

But heroes, at times, had to be fools.

The relationship of the toastmaster to speaker should be the same as that of the fan to the fan dancer. It should call attention to the subject without making any particular effort to cover it.

Change is as good as a rest. It keeps me fresh.

Without my morning coffee I'm just like a dried up piece of roast goat.

My buddies wanted to be firemen, farmers or policemen, something like that. Not me, I just wanted to steal people's money!

Success is deciding from the start what end result you want and creating the circumstances to realize that result.

I have discovered that the unasked-for accident can be the salvation of what you are doing.

I write scenes - often quite long scenes - mainly because I still get seduced into writing six lines where one and a half will do.