Did you see the 2000 Republican Presidential Convention? The last time the Republicans had that many Black people on a stage, they were selling them!

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

The pen is truly mightier than the sword. Unless you're holding a pen and the other guy's holding a sword.

The answer to finding better work/life balance is to find the right blend between all our life activities—regardless of where and when they occur.

[Seeing an ornately chained Native American for the first time] What Eden have they torn you from?

I like writing letters and receiving letters. It's a shame that we've lost the art of letter-writing and saving correspondence. I mourn that.

Great innovation only happens when people aren't afraid to do things differently.

I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.

I only know that I love you. That's your misfortune.

The living Jesus will give you joy amid tribulation.

The single most amazing phenomenon is the discrediting of idealism.

The art of living consists in knowing which impulses to obey and which must be made to obey.