Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

When one's craft is rooted in strong relationship, he or she lures the into becoming a part of the show.

They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.

People have a hard time accepting anything that overwhelms them.

A person dies every second, but there’s also a six year old somewhere, every second, trying to move an apple with his mind.

A jump jockey has to throw his heart over the fence - and then go over and catch it.

Obamacare covers very few people.

I make bad choices. I've got such dodgy tastes in men.

Once you have decided that winning isn't everything, you become a winner.

When you feel destructive, negative emotions like hate and anger arise within you towards the person opposing you; cultivate the opposite state of mind.

Inexperience is an asset. Embrace it.