Do you think there’s anything to eat in this forest?” “Yes,” said the wizard bitterly, “us.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

One of the happiest moments of life is when you learn to love without expecting any return.

This far north the sun was still up, although very low, riding through the mountains as if looking for something it lost on the ground.

Everyday is an opportunity to come up with a possible resolution that you can achieve.

Be careful with your faith !It could make you see the good side of hell on earth.

Nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history therefore we must be saved by faith.

Okay. I've got a good one." Simon stroked Isabelle's hair feeling her lashes flutter against his neck as she closed her eyes. "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.

The only way to reconcile science and religion is to set up something which is not science and something that is not religion.

The hardest part of the day is all the stuff after I open my eyes in the morning.

Their is no defense against criticism except obscurity.

Give your friend cause to blush, and you will be likely to lose him.