Does anyone act more like an overserious senior citizen with time running out on their chance for immortality than someone in their twenties?

The idea of, 'The journey is the destination' is put into action by browsing in an indie record store. Besides, a human being is a much better guide than a 'More Like This' link on the internet.

So when you spot violence, or bigotry, or intolerance or fear or just garden-variety misogyny, hatred or ignorance, just look it in the eye and think, 'The good outnumber you, and we always will.'

If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins.

I want to experience as many different tastes, sights, emotions, conflicts, and cultures as possible, so that I can expand the canvas of my memory and enrich my comedy.

Is it bad when you refer to all alcohol as "Pain Go Bye-Bye Juice"?

I fantasize and idealize myself as Bugs Bunny, but I know deep down I'm Daffy Duck.

You have to be ruthless with yourself, in terms of being honest about what is working and what is not.

Meal isn't over when I'm full. Meal's over when I hate myself.

I hate all sidekicks.

I identify myself as a stand-up first. Even though lately there's been an explosion of acting on my schedule.

Thou art a manGod is no moreThy own humanityLearn to adore

You don't need to change everything in your life instantly. All you need is one positive thought.

Dandelion wine. The words were summer on the tongue. The wine was summer caught and stoppered...sealed away for opening on a January day with snow falling fast and the sun unseen for weeks...

When you dig another out of their troubles you find a place to bury your own.

Yes, a dark time passed over this land, but now there is something like light.

Burn bread every day boy, no toaster

It's clear enough that there was substantial fraud in Ohio, thus delivering the Electoral College vote for President Bush.

The main rule to me is to honor God with your life. To live a life of integrity. Not be selfish. You know, help others. But that's really the essence of the Christian faith.

A gentleman of one of the first fortunes upon the continent...sacrificing his ease, and hazarding all in the cause of his country.

Yoga is the perfect way to de-stress and work out at the same time.