Does your uncle need anything? A coffee? A latte?” “He needs someone to bear his illegitimate child if you’re interested

You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT

I stop fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now. T-shirt

We're like the Three Musketeers, searching for truth and justice and the American way.: Glitch snorted. "More like the Three Blind Mice, stumbling around trying to find a hunk of cheese in the dark.

I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.

There is a great need for a sarcasm font.

Reyes Farrow. Because perfection is a dirty job, but someone has to do it.

I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.

I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.

I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT

Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.

He buried his hands in the rich velvet of her hair. “I thought I’d die for wanting you.

Always be in love.

Within the grand scale of things, sitting in a classroom day after day is so utterly meaningless and pointless that it actually makes his chest hurt to think about it.

Weakness derives from the soul. Most everyone has one, which gives a woman like me leverage. Leverage to play people to my liking, and so I do.

The keeping of bees is like the direction of sunbeams.

I'm not supposed to know what's going on. But I can tell you this, I won't be standing around scratching my head like Coach Johnson in that Denorex commercial.

I think the Internet is the most dangerous thing invented since the atomic bomb.

I used to be treated like an idiot, now I'm treated like an idiot savant.

Both of them were ahead of their time, but they didn't live long enough to see the time they were ahead of.

Murdoch paid too much for the Wall Street Journal even when he didn't have any competition.