Domestic abuse is wrong, but domestic retribution is okay.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

It's hard to beat a person who never gives up.

Every time a champion makes a decision they have a chance to learn something new, regardless of the outcome.

Go on your way, use you brain, be innovative, achieve your dreams and don’t turn back, because you left so many envious people behind you !! …

Don't lose the one who fights with you to be with you!

I think that the main issue with inequality is not the gap between the rich and the poor. It is the gap between the earnings of top business leaders and the salaries of academics and journalists.

If a white man falls off a chair drunk, it's just a drunk. If a Negro does, it's the whole damn Negro race.

Awards become corroded, friends gather no dust.

I'm very comfortable as a singer. In fact, I think it's more - I identified my self-esteem, my self more in those ways when I was growing up. I really - it was kind of my calling card as a kid.

Ye know what me Sean used to say, God rest his soul? He said, 'A friend will help ye move, Katie, but a really good friend will help ye move a body.

I detest those who deceive me.