Don't bite the hand that has your allowance in it.

The human hand is made complete by the addition of a baseball.

May you look back on the past with as much pleasure as you look forward to the future.

The odds are six to five that the light in the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an oncoming train.

Airplane Law, The: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.

Allen's Law of Civilization: It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it.

Abrams's Advice: When eating an elephant, take one bite at a time.

A businessman needs three umbrellas - one to leave at the office, one to leave at home, and one to leave on the train.

No experiment is ever a complete failure. It can always be used as a bad example.

Abbott's Admonitions: (1) If you have to ask, you're not entitled to know. (2) If you don't like the answer, you shouldn't have asked the question.

A system tends to grow in complexity instead of simplicity, until the resulting unreliability becomes intolerable.

And the thing about trying to cheat death is that, in the end, you still lose.

Peace is when we look upon the world together.

In the end, we must remember that no one can become what they need to be by remaining where the are. Until there is motion nothing can change.

Jesus paid a high price for your peace. Don't give it away.

Customs form us all, our thoughts, our morals, our most fixed beliefs; are consequences of our place of birth.

Every now and then I will play; I try to focus on charitable work. I might do it because it's an offer I can't refuse, so I rally and try to stay in shape and keep myself active.

The patience is in the living. Time opens out to you.

I don't think getting in and out of a limousine has anything to do with being an icon.

Hold it the greatest sin to prefer existence to honour, and for the sake of life to lose the reasons for living.

If you have to learn it from a self-help book, you may be beyond help.