Don't confuse efforts with results....

Craftsmanship names an enduring, basic human impulse, the desire to do a job well for its own sake.

We never make sport of religion, politics, race or mothers. A mother never gets hit with a custard pie. Mothers-in-law-yes. But mothers-never.

We are more likely to fail as craftsmen due to our inability to organize obsession than because of our lack of ability.

Authority is itself inherently an act of imagination.

The more Keystone comedies I make, the more convinced I become that comedy is an art, and a high one at that.

Issac Stern rule: the better your technique, the more impossible your standards.

There are girls, not specially beautiful, whom you could not lose in a crowd. There are other girls, apparently perfect in beauty, who seem to melt into insignificance.

The pleasures of relaxed chat, of casual conversation, encourage the ethnographer in everyone

Beloved King of Comedy.

If nothing changes then nothing changes.

You were made for a particular purpose, but you can be anything you want. Anything, including that.

We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery.

I'm not afraid to admit my weaknesses.

Rather than just becoming embittered by your friends' success, I think it can motivate you.

Nobody ever asked me to do anything. Nobody knew what to do. When comics were brand new, nobody knew what kind of comics to make. So you were mostly on your own.

Arsenal means every thing to me. I've been here since I was nine and I love the Club.

If you don't believe in yourself nobody else will believe in you.

We're ostriches and the whole world is sand.

We need a new government that works.

I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence I can reach for; perfection is God's business.