Don't run if you can walk. Don't walk if you can stand. Don't stand if you can sit. Don't sit if you can lie down.

Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.

Remember. Every day, some ordinary person does something extraordinary. Today, it's your turn.

I follow three rules: Do the right thing, do the best you can, and always show people you care.

Don't tell your problems to people: eighty percent don't care; and the other twenty percent are glad you have them.

Don't ever promise more than you can deliver, but always deliver more than you promise.

Winners embrace hard work. They love the discipline of it, the trade-off they're making to win. Losers, on the other hand, see it as punishment. And that's the difference.

When all is said and done, more is said than done.

I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions.

Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you respond to it.

We aren't where we want to be; we aren't where we ought to be; but thank goodness we aren't where we used to be.

Are you sleepwalking?' A voice asked behind me. "I was testing dorm security, " I said. "It sucks.

Do not respond to people being upset by confidently giving them advice on how to solve their problems

He sees daily evidence that many things held to be true by nine-tenths of all men are, in reality, false, and he is thereby apt to acquire a doubt of everything, including his own beliefs.

I don't believe my house was haunted. I think I had an overactive imagination, and I was so convinced that those around me became convinced, too.

It's a great thing to see the strength of simplicity.

And we are a people without tears. The things that moved our parents do not move us at all.

Properly channeled, common feelings of inadequacy lead to powers of accomplishment.

The energy of the universe is constant.

Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.

Call up, ring once, hang up the phone to let me know you made it home. Don't want nothing to be wrong with my part time lover.