Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

I sometimes think that the universe is a machine designed for the perpetual astonishment of astronomers.

People say that to me and I think what unites all my characters is that they are hurt; it's most accurate to say I play characters that are hurt but are responding to their environment.

He who needs only coarse food, water and drink, and as pillow his folded arms will find happiness without further search.

Just relief of trying to get there for eight years. It's finally here and I'm very excited. It's just great. It's been a long ride.

Sometimes the last person on earth you want to be with is the one person you can't be without.

I do believe in an afterlife. I try to be at one with people and try to love life as much as I can.

I cannot see why we should expect an infinite God to do better in another world than he does in this.

Death happens to the body with which it is associated, with which it mixes. The delusion that the body is the core, that the body is real, that verily is the death.

The miser, poor fool, not only starves his body, but also his own soul.

I love basketball players for what they do for their size - so graceful.