Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

She felt trapped, but she didn't have to. The world is wide open and ready, waiting for us to escape this bubble and join it.

"If you don't make mistakes, you aren't really trying."

Too much good taste can be boring

No art is less spontaneous than mine. What I do is the result of reflection and the study of the great masters.

Our clothing, while modest and simple, should be of good quality . . . It should be chosen for durability rather than display.

Wit is a sword; it is meant to make people feel the point as well as see it.

Chances rule men and not men chances.

Yes to market economy, no to market society.

I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them.

Anything that makes us forget who we are and what we want; that way we can work in order to produce, reproduce, and earn money.