Don't think of it as losing a boyfriend. Think of it as gaining a stalker." -Dan Cahill

Ask yourself: 'Do I feel the need to laminate?' Then teaching is for you.

When we lock things away," he said with conviction, "we're really imprisoning ourselves.

The dog always dies. Go to the library and pick out a book with an award sticker and a dog on the cover. Trust me, that dog is going down.

If it isn't on YouTube, it might as well have never happened.

Ask me. I'm a cow expert.

In our family, you don't get a childhood. We're too busy trying to dominate the world.

The thing about a cavity search is this: it has nothing to do with the dentist.

What did Romeo and Juliet do?” They died,” I remind her gently. “Some mix-up with the poison-

I hate France. It's like the whole country's on a diet

Global warming doesn't care what's in your bank account." -Sinead Starling

When a man cannot choose, he ceases to be a man.

One cannot use the life to interpret the work. But One can use the work to interpret the life.

People are living books. The real library of life is community.

If you're asking yourself who the content is for, it's already too late to make an impact.

My dream is to save women from nature.

The thing that distinguishes America is that it is a republican form of government - anything that is not outlawed or specifically barred or regulated by the [Constitution] is LEGAL.

For an impenetrable shield, stand inside yourself

Envy is a kind of praise.

He had on a funny T-shirt, as usual. Today's featured acartoon figure running from a giant T. rex, and it read EXERCISE: SOME MOTIVATIONREQUIRED.

All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients.