Don't use big words. They mean so little.

The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.

Always forgive your enemies nothing annoys them so much.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

Everyone may not be good, but there's always something good in everyone. Never judge anyone shortly because every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

Be yourself; everyone else is taken.

Women are made to be loved, not understood.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

Calvin:"It says here that 'religion is the opiate of the masses.'...what do you suppose that means?"Television: "...it means that Karl Marx hadn't seen anything yet

A good joke doesn’t necessarily need appreciation from others. One can freely laugh at one’s own deserving jokes.

Human relationships are strange. I mean, you are with one person a while, eating and sleeping and living with them, loving them, talking to them, going places together, and then it stops.

We had no idea that this show [Daredevil] would be as popular as it was, but with the benefit of hindsight, one thing I can say is that I think that was a really, really smart move.

Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.

Don't agonise, organise.

You just can't wake up out of bed and think you can figure out a gym. You definitely need some personal training.

When you find yourself in bed with an ugly woman, the best thing to do is close your eyes and get on with it

I am absorbed in the magic of movement and light. Movement never lies. It is the magic of what I call the outer space of the imagination.

If at first you don't succeed, try management.