Dreams don't come true. Dreams die. Dreams get compromised. Dreams end up dealing meth in a booth at the back of the Olive Garden. Dreams choke to death on bay leaves. Dreams get spleen cancer.

Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.

Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without.

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.

Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.

Eagles are seagulls with a good hairdo.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code?

When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.

Never wish unto others what you wouldn't wish for yourself.

I have always thought of Christmas time... as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time.

If you want to finish, sometimes you can't just finish. You gotta finish fast!

I am a pack of nerves while waiting for the moment, and this feeling grows and grows and grows and then it explodes, it is a physical joy, a dance, space and time united. Yes, yes, yes, yes!

Bigotry is chronic dogmatism.

The idea is to write it so that people hear it and it slides through the brain and goes straight to the heart.

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.

Money can't buy you back the love that you had then

I am very excited about the future.

He was in the right place at the right time, but he might have been elsewhere on a different afternoon.