Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Great language and great literature do not survive long without each other

Speak for yourself. Only rank ignorance measures a man by appearances.

Superstition is the poetry of life.

If they don't let me coach, they might as well take me to the Lexington cemetery.

The land urges us to come around to an understanding of ourselves.

I'm saying goodbye to people's perception of me and who I am, I'm not saying goodbye to me, because this has always been me.

Did you ever admire an empty-headed writer for his or her mastery of the language? No. So your own winning style must begin with ideas in your head.

Like a midget at a urinal I was going to have to stay on my toes.

No, you will never see me on 'Dancing With the Stars.' Sorry.

We are far from the so called 'end of history,' since the conditions for a sustainable and peaceful development have not yet been adequately articulated and realized.