English grammar is so complex and confusing for the one very simple reason that its rules and terminology are based on Latin, a language with which it has precious little in common.

I can't think of anything that excites a greater sense of childlike wonder than to be in a country where you are ignorant of almost everything.

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age.

If you can imagine a man having a vasectomy without anesthetic to the sound of frantic sitar-playing, you will have some idea of what popular Turkish music is like.

That's the trouble with losing your mind; by the time it's gone, it's too late to get it back.

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old.

Geologists are never at a loss for paperweights.

Of all the things I am not very good at, living in the real world is perhaps the most outstanding.

Physics is really nothing more than a search for ultimate simplicity, but so far all we have is a kind of elegant messiness.

Protons give an atom its identity, electrons its personality.

Why is it, I wondered, that old people are always so self-centered and excitable? But I just smiled benignly and stood back, comforted by the thought that soon they would be dead.

You two are bad, sneaking behind Mr. Caswell’s back, getting a little something, something on the side.

There was one slight, desperate chance, and that I decided I must take--it was for Dejah Thoris, and no man has lived who would not risk a thousand deaths for such as she.

A thought for today: 'People change and forget to tell each other.'

We are all shitty little snowflakes dancing in the universe.

It is therefore vital for you to understand that being single-" separate, unique, and whole"- is most essential to, and the foundation of, not only marital relationships but all relationships.

Those who think only for a year, they sow food grains; those who think for a decade, they plant fruits; But those who think for generations, they prepare humans.

The ministry is a weight from which even an angel might shrink

That which is not, shall never be; that which is, shall never cease to be. To the wise, these truths are self-evident.

The exact objectives of Islam Inc. are obscure. Needless to say everyone involved has a different angle, and they all intend to cross each other up somewhere along the line.