[Epitaph:] Involved in a plot.

Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.

I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.

Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

Learning to appreciate the beauty that surrounds you is one of the keys to your happiness.

Cold is cold.

Whenever the insistence is on the point that God answers prayer we are off the track. The meaning of prayer is that we get hold of God not of the answer.

After all, there's only one aswer to be made to the young fellow who is asking constantly for advice as to how to hit. The answer is: "Pick out a good one and sock it!

I forgot he [Barack Obama] was black tonight for an hour.

I love the fans and I appreciate how much they care for me.

That wild beast which lives in man and does not dare to show itself until the barriers of law and custom have been removed, was now set free.

I will love you if you are stupid, if you slip and fall on your face, if you do the wrong thing, if you make mistakes, if you behave like a human being — I will love you no matter.

I was raised by muses. Women who had men in awe of them and who wrote them movies and wrote them music.

To be struck twice by two different cyclones is unusual, to say the least.