Even Donald Trump's hairpiece is fed up with his insults and says it now supports Bernie Sanders. When Trump found out, he sobbed

What do you call a comedian who runs for president? A trump card.

Trump appeals to right-wingnuts because when the going gets tough, they wig out.

Did evangelical Christians mistake Donald Trump's hairpiece for a halo, while ignoring the obvious signs that he worships Mammon?

Donald Trump has taken the Peter Principle to unprecedented heights. Or is it depths?

If brevity is the soul of wit then brevity and levity are the whole of it.

It's not that every leaf must finally fall, it's just that we can never catch them all.

Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.

Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.

Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick; Donald Trump speaks loudly and carries a big shtick.

It's simply not true that Donald Trump has no experience in foreign affairs. Hell, two of his foreign affairs resulted in marriages!

Ellysetta Baristani." Belliard's voice caused her to stop and turn back around. "Even should you clothe yourself in rags and dirt, you would bring honor to the Fey.

Water is one of the least understood aspects of biology.

What I would be quite wise to remember is that ‘pieces’ are not the end of what was, but the beginning of what is to be.

Being considerate of others will take you and your children further in life than any college or professional degree.

Nothing determines who we will become so much as those things we choose to ignore.

I would rather stand alone in the light of truth than in the crowd filled with error.

When I was 13, I remember crying on my mum's shoulder when my first girlfriend dumped me via MSN Messenger. That was cold.

Some people think that doctors and nurses can put scrambled eggs back into the shell.

What impressed me most about New York were its huge apartment houses.

I was an actor in Japan and I'm a regular on about three shows. I'm grateful for all of it. My personal activities like that help Big Bang as a whole as well.