Even though sometimes you can control your anger, you can't control your sadness.

Junie B. Jones. The B stands for Beatrice. Except, I don't like Beatrice. I just like B and that's all.

A little glitter can turn your whole day around.

I don't really believe in pretending to be happy when you're not. Mostly I believe that you should burden your friends with your problems.

I was a good kid, but I was just very chatty. Teachers were rarely entertained, but occasionally a child was, which was enough for me. Everything was so urgent. I needed to say it immediately.

I'm not actually sure I'm grown-up enough for grown-up books.

My senior year of high school, I was voted Wittiest. So, several years later, I decided to try my hand at writing humor to see if I could be witty enough to make some money.

Can't we be friends?' I hate your guts, Frankovitch' Can't our guts be friends?

I don't even like clowns. Clowns are not normal people.

I find the term perfect child to be an oxymoron.

A stick or a stone only stings for a minute. A name seems to hurt forever.

She tasted of coffee and day old poetry.

I believe that one defines oneself by reinvention. To not be like your parents. To not be like your friends. To be yourself. To cut yourself out of stone.

The great irony is that people who live in remote areas, who are illiterate and don't own TVs, are in some ways more free because they are beyond the reach of indoctrination by the modern mass media.

It sounds gross to say that I like myself more. But not everyone likes themselves that much. Especially in the comedy world.

Keep in mind that many people have died for their beliefs; it's actually quite common. The real courage is in living and suffering for what you believe.

The peoples influenced by the animal dance have a variety of movements and dance with enthusiasm; those who do not know the animal dance have few movements and show little zest for dancing.

If you are all open in your heart, you are clean. If you are all open in your self, you are naive.

I've sung background for a couple of bands.

There is no happiness where there is no wisdom.

I hate politics. What they say and what they do is completely different.