Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do.

The biotechnology wave is similar to the information technology wave of the 1980s and 1990s.

The doctors are always changing their opinions. They always have some new fad.

Kenny Burrell is the grand master of jazz guitar.

Live today like there's no tomorrow!

I was never able to have three of four beers. One's too many, and ten just ain't enough. Basically it's the way I've been since high school.

My family is very musical, I was surrounded by it. And from four years old I was the one that asked my mother could I take piano lessons.

Our nation's military and law enforcement personal work hard to protect us. We must thank them for their continued vigilance. Without their sacrifice we would less capable of protecting our nation.

The Gospel is not about going from bad to good, it's about going from dead to alive!

Sometimes it's just enough to keep your body moving. I get depressed if I don't move.

Only a woman can write what it is to feel as a woman, to be a woman.