Every dog on the face of the earth wants me dead.

I can't think of anything that excites a greater sense of childlike wonder than to be in a country where you are ignorant of almost everything.

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age.

If you can imagine a man having a vasectomy without anesthetic to the sound of frantic sitar-playing, you will have some idea of what popular Turkish music is like.

That's the trouble with losing your mind; by the time it's gone, it's too late to get it back.

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old.

Geologists are never at a loss for paperweights.

Of all the things I am not very good at, living in the real world is perhaps the most outstanding.

Physics is really nothing more than a search for ultimate simplicity, but so far all we have is a kind of elegant messiness.

Protons give an atom its identity, electrons its personality.

Why is it, I wondered, that old people are always so self-centered and excitable? But I just smiled benignly and stood back, comforted by the thought that soon they would be dead.

If you wish to make Pythocles rich, do not add to his store of money, but subtract from his desires.

It is singularity which often makes the worst part of our suffering, as it always does of our conduct.

This is Bourbon Street, isn’t it? Where’s the freakin’ bourbon?

An honest government is the childish dream of the gullible men!

I like the way Twitter makes one be more concise.It looks like someone is saying sometthing wise

Get your filthy paws off my son, feet pue tan!" Cherise

Are you the dart?" he said. "Are you the knife? The fuse?" She said (though he wasn't convinced): "My deane, my poppet, I am too green to walk into a public place and do something bad.

There was no more dangerous a time in a nation's life than the passing of a ruler when the succession was in doubt.

I think you can save and spend to live for however long you live. You just have to be flexible if things don't go as plan.

I just want to play real human beings. You know, I don't care if they're male or female.