Every fight is a food fight when youre a cannibal.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

It was a clear, black morning, encrusted with stars.

Don't ask the world to stop moving because you have doubts.

Hale!' Kat cried, but the boy only stared at her. 'Fine,' she conceded. 'I love your boat.' 'Ship.' 'Ship ... Your ship is beautiful.

Snowball just leads elves on, elves and Santas. He is playing a dangerous game.

Hope, even more than necessity, is the mother of invention.

Many axes are being kept under cover, waiting in ambush, ready to pounce, when we resign. Have no worries. We will deliver this homeland to you perfectly clean, as it was in Atatürk's time.

The real rub is finding that authentic self and it's not something that's going to come to you overnight.

It is much less what we do than what we think, which fits us for the future.

The reason why we obtain no more in prayer is because we expect no more. God usually answers us according to our own hearts.

There is no college for the conscience.