Every politician must be able to keep both feet on the fence with his ear to the ground.

Never place a period where God has placed a comma.

We favor putting Congress on a commission basis. Pay them for results. If they do a good job and the country prospers, they get 10% of the extra take.

This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.

A friend asked her doctor if a woman should have children after thirty-five. I said, "Thirty-five children is enough for any woman.

This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.

They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it.

I don't see what difference it makes what side it's [your bread] buttered on. I always eat both sides.

The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.

My mind works so fast. When I think of something I say it. Lots of times I say it even before I think of it.

A platform is something a candidate stands for and the voters fall for.

Your life becomes precious when you use your thoughts and actions to make someone precious in your life.

Who needs toothpaste when you have cigarettes?

Phones are only good for ordering pizza and telling someone you're running late

Cameron, my heart is quite literally in this,

Just like you need to strengthen your core physically with exercise, you also need to strength your core spiritually.

But for the unquiet heart and brain A use in measured language lies; The sad mechanic exercise Like dull narcotics numbing pain.

As long as we live there is never enough singing.

When eight row together with swing the boat becomes the ninth rower.

The philosophy that I've embraced isn't about sitting under a tree and studying my navel.

When every blessed thing you have is made of silver, or of gold, you long for simple pewter.