Everything comes to him who waits, except a loaned book.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

It's not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.

Surround yourself with those conducive to you being your highest self.

HE who says there is no such thing as an honest man, you may be sure is himself a knave.

Children teach us how to chase without overrunning.

I think really, China, Chinese, I think they really have a long history of civilization, rich culture.

That's the problem with having a moral code. We want to destroy the jerkish part of the jerks, but we want to save the human being underneath.

A study last year showed that the page you turn to first in the newspaper can be a predictor of how long you will live. No surprise, turning first to the Comics Pages prolongs your life.

The moment you value yourself, the whole world values you.

Americans don’t want drama, especially good drama, they just want their boredom killed.

My vision is to inspire others to find purpose and happiness.