Everything in nature has found a niche, a perfect harmony of balance. Man need to find his niche, his perfect balance, where he fits in the natural cycle

God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.

Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us.

Internet users, that blue screen of death you were looking at this morning? That's the sky. If you're still confused, look it up on Wikipedia tomorrow.

It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy Jewy.

I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.

This is America. We must defend the principles symbolized by Lady Liberty - unless she's on the pill, in which case, she is a giant green tramp.

Don't cry over spilled milk. By this time tomorrow, it'll be free yogurt.

An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.

Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit to stupidity.

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!

Only love that continues to flow in the face of anger, blame, and indifference can be called love. All else is simply a transaction.

Wealth is not without its advantages and the case to the contrary, although it has often been made, has never proved widely persuasive.

From a management standpoint, it is very important to know how to unleash people's inborn creativity. My concept is that anybody has creative ability, but very few people know how to use it.

The greatest living person in the world is some individual who at this very moment has gone in love to help another.

His lashes, fluttered like butterfly wings. "I could've made you happy, dove." "You did," I whispered

Myself, Marion Jones and Michael Johnson all got married on the same day because it was the only point on the athletics' schedule we could fit in. October 3, 1998.

Life is a circle. The end of one journey is the beginning of the next.

I want to know what it is, this 'sin' they say I've committed.

Keep the best, forget the rest.

If there was no Internet, my career would have ended in 1995.