FOOVIEW (foo' view) n. The ability of a dog to inflict guilt from any angle in the room while he watches his master eat.

Women say they want a man who knows what a woman's worth. That's a pimp.

When you go to work, if your name is on the building, you're rich. If your name is on your desk, you're middle class. And if your name is on your shirt, you're poor.

The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.

The part of the envelope that tells a person where to place the stamp when they can't quite figure it out for themselves.

Having to wander through a maze of ropes at an airport or bank even when you are the only person in line.

As an American, I'd like to apologize - for everything.

The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

In Montana, a policeman will pull you over because he is lonely.

Manhandling the open here spout on a milk carton so badly that one has to resort to using the illegal side.

Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.

You can flourish by faith.

Each and all of us must summon to mind the words of Him whom we honor this Easter time: 'When a strong man, armed, keepeth his palace, his goods are in peace'.

Lenin, the greatest theorist of them all, did not know what he was going to do after he had got the power.

Liberalism itself, is, on all matters connected with Church and Education, only a kind of corporate and "respectable" ungodliness.

I like doing a challenging class because it makes me more brave in life. My perception of hardships is now completely different. I'm not whining and moaning inside as much.

The question of the composition of perceptible objects is one which already occupied the mind of the ancient Greeks.

I don't believe in coincidence.

I would say the hummingbird really deserves the royalties on [some of my songs].

I never do the dishes, because my husband has an affinity for it. And I'm also not allowed to touch the coffeemaker.

Photography is art when it's used by an artist.