Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment

People forget the good that zoos do. If it weren't for zoos, we would have so many species that would be extinct today.

If the guy's a cutie, you've gotta tap that booty.

I'm a teenager trapped in an old body.

I may be a senior, but so what? I'm still hot.

Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on.

If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.

Get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep. 9 if you're ugly.

We didn’t have Facebook in my day, we had a phone book but you wouldn’t waste an afternoon on it

I don't know how people get so anti-something. Just mind your own business, take care of your own affairs, and don't worry about other people so much.

Retirement is not in my vocabulary. They aren't going to get rid of me that way.

Teachers have three loves: love of learning, love of learners, and the love of bringing the first two loves together.

I'm one of the most fortunate people in the world.

I know that being upset without having an avenue to fix anything is a real hard place to be in for too long. But it's even worse thinking that it'll go away if you just ignore it.

When you're willing to do what you're unqualified to do, that's what qualifies you.

You know, Salma Hayek is a great cook, and she's a friend.. She's an amazing cook. If she opened up a restaurant, I would so get in on the coattails.

I have always regarded divorce as essentially disagreeable, like castor oil, but necessary.

We are presumptuous not when we marvel at His grace, but when we reject it.

A man doesn't need to be flawless to be a perfect father, but the commitment to his family is a precious responsibility.

Vision - You dream the impossible; You imagine the incredible; You achieve the extraordinary.

Evil's lurking, I can see him smirking.