False hope is better than no hope at all.

Love is like skydiving without a parachute.

Of course I believe in hell. I have three brothers.

A person without regrets is called a corpse.

A wedding is no way to begin a marriage.

What if there's no such thing as PMS, and this is just my personality?

You guys gotta get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father.

Taxes for people with too much damned time on their hands.

Expect stupid. It's everywhere.

The trouble with insanity is it can flare up at the most inconvenient moments.

If men were necessary in the procreation process, they'd have gone the way of the dodo bird long ago.

I searched my mind for the right visualization. I knew it had to start with what I put in my head. That is where all my accomplishments are formed.

I'll tell you what I'm grateful for, and that's the clarity of understanding that the most important things in life are health, family and friends, and the time to spend on them.

Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in awhile, or the light won't come in.

When confronted with a challenge, the committed heart will search for a solution. The undecided heart searches for an escape.

I'm just taking one step at a time. I could zigzag one way, but it's not usually on purpose.

In the modern world, the interests of a particular community can no longer be considered to lie within the confines of its own boundaries.

Nicholas Parsons' time at the University of Glasgow seems to be absolutely shrouded in mystery.

You should not bear insults.

Even a strong man can succumb to the wiles of a pretty girl with pointy shoes.

When a dog is chasing after you, whistle for him.