Fang: "Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?"

Good memories are like charms...Each is special. You collect them, one by one, until one day you look back and discover they make a long, colorful bracelet.

Your mind creates your reality. If you expect nothing, you open up the universe to give you options. If you expect the worst, you usually get it.

A friend of mine once defined love as finding someone you can talk to late into the night

Some poeple just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.

Oh great. Yoda captured us.

Who, last time I'd checked, was still on our official archenemy list. (Yes, we have to keep a list. It's kind of sad.)

They call me, The Sharkalator

At that moment I had no mind to change, or not change, or throw against the nearest wall.

I don't get a chance to be funny with the thrillers. I like to be funny, and I think I am really funny. So with 'Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life', it was fun to let loose.

I had to give him props, but how annoying of him to be a hero when I was trying so hard to dislike him. It was downright selfish.

Before you ask God for more blessings, try to first thank Him for all your past and present blessings in your life.

If the truth contradicts deeply held beliefs, that is too bad.

Anybody who knows me knows that I'm no attack dog.

I'm so busy during my everyday, when I go on vacation I need to pull the plug like they say, and to do nothing.

I assert with confidence that the law of success, here and hereafter, is to have a humble and a prayerful heart, and to work, work, work.

One of the ways to avoid being beaten by the system is to laugh at it.

Agents are used to the parents pimping. They're not used to the kid pimping.

One may define flattery as a base companionship which is most advantageous to the flatterer.

We are an episode between two oblivions.

Vile worm, thou wast o'erlook'd even in thy birth.