Few things in life are less efficient than a group of people trying to write a sentence. The advantage of this method is that you end up with something for which you will not be personally blamed.

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

Empathy nurtures wisdom. Apathy cultivates ignorance.

There are such moments in life, when, in order for heaven to open, it is necessary for a door to close.

Even if I'm hormonal and I feel like I've got a couple pounds of water weight, I will never starve myself, I will never, ever go on a diet.

We live in a fractured world. I've always seen it as my role as an artist to attempt to make wholeness.

Today was opening day for the new Congress in Washington. And Vice President Joe Biden swore in the new batch of White House fence jumpers.

I have always hated machinery, and the only machine I ever understood was a wheelbarrow, and that but imperfectly.

I like to approach every day like it's the only day I will ever have.

I've never seen the yellow light, umm the yellow line be wrong.

The purest magic is in the heart.

I'm Jewish. I've always had a thing where it's okay to dance with the devil, just don't become the devil.