Filing is concerned with the past; anything you actually need to see again has to do with the future.

Find out what you like doing best, and get someone to pay you for it.

Why do born-again people so often make you wish they'd never been born the first time?

Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing?

It is a pity that so often the only way to treat girls like people seems to be to treat them like boys.

There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.

A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.

The main purpose of children's parties is to remind you that there are children more awful than your own.

When it comes to housework the one thing no book of household management can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why.

The disease is painless; it's the cure that hurts.

Any committee that is the slightest use is composed of people who are too busy to want to sit on it for a second longer than they have to.

You know the greatest lesson of history? It's that history is whatever the victors say it is...Whoever wins, that's who decides the history.

The sinews of war are infinite money.

Why not add benefits for making healthy food choices, provide a transition bonus for getting off food stamps, or increase job training opportunities and income - raising minimum wage?

The good movies that people want to keep are probably creating their value more than anything else.

This may be the most important proposition revealed by history: At the time, no one knew what was coming.

I am a nerd, but I don't dive head-first into any fiefdom of nerdiness, except for maybe 'Star Trek.'

So I have this word for much of what I do in life: 'plorking.' I'm not playing and I'm not working, I'm plorking.

My hair walks into a room before I do.

We still need to secure our southern border. The other thing I would say is we need to secure who visits us in the country.