For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

The good and wise lead quite lives

One of the biggest problem is to notice everything, Secrets and lies kill relationships.

My ideas aren't afraid of height.

Alas, my lord, your wisdom is consumed in confidence.

Most of the things we decide are not what we know to be the best. We say yes, merely because we are driven into a corner and must say something.

Yet the deepest truths are best read between the lines, and, for the most part, refuse to be written.

The role of the comedian is to say 'Wait a minute' when a consensus starts to form.

My first Grammy wasn't even in a jazz category, but of course I was really excited. 'Rockit' was the beginning of kind of a new era for the whole hip-hop movement.

I am one of those irritating people, who hang on to the door-knob after they say good-bye, and will neither come back nor go, always remembering something else which must be said.

When I'm on a location, I pick a restaurant that's close and private and eat all my meals there.