Fortune is like a coquette; if you don't run after her, she will run after you.

Laughter is the fireworks of the soul.

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.

Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.

The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards: one hides his store, and the other stores his hide.

Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first.

Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.

The happiest time in any man's life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.

the only difference between you and someone you envy is you settled for less

The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children.

To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there.

I've always boxed, I always taught boxing.

Comics seem to be cooking these days. It's like being a rock star.

On close inspection, this device turned out to be a funereal juke box - the result of mixing Lloyd's of London with the principle of the chewing gum dispenser.

Before I did 'How I Met Your Mother,' I was not considered a comedic actress.

I felt so full of love for everything. But at the same time, I felt so hung out there to dry, like nobody could ever understand. I felt so alone in this world, and so loved at the same time.

A country whose population has been trained to accept the government's word and to shun those who question it is a country without liberty in its future.

Perhaps the most important reason for self-disclosure is that without it we cannot truly love.