General: Where are you from? Spike: London. General: Which part? Spike: ... Well, all of me.

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.

How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.

Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee. What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?

We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!

Always remember that with privilege comes responsibility. You must go to Casa Azul and see the place you came from. Only then will you be able to understand how far you've come.

The sweet spot is where duty and delight converge.

Does life teach us anything more, I wondered, than not to cry over all there is to cry about?

Entrepreneurs in accepting risk achieve security for all. In embracing change they ensure social and economic stability.

There was no quick grief for Andrew because he had been so slowly lost. First from my heart, then from my mind, and only finally from my life.

That's one of my jobs, just trying to do what I can to help this team out as much as possible.

I make a rich woman beg, I'll make a good woman steal. I'll make an old woman blush, and make a young woman squeal.

Therefore. Ergo. Erg. Argh. Ugh.

Steve Jobs was the greatest inventor since Thomas Edison. He put the world at our fingertips.

Instead of me keeping my art a personal thing, we can use it to save lives, change lives and inspire.