George W. Bush has a new campaign slogan: "A reformer with results." I don't know what it means [but] I think it's better than his old campaign slogan: "A dumb guy with connections.

Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger.

They say there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in this country. But if you ask a Native American, that number is more like 300 million.

Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?

I feel like Bush presidencies are like "Godfather" films. You should stop at two.

I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, "So does the guy I stole it from."

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know? some of these jokes just write themselves.

Way too much coffee. But if it weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.

Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late.

How well do we actually know ourselves? Can we dare to say that we really know someone, like really, really know them?

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is let someone love you.

We live, in fact, in a world starved for solitude, silence, and private: and therefore starved for meditation and true friendship.

Everyone who has ever taken a shower has had an idea. It's theperson who gets out of the shower, dries off, and does somethingabout it that makes a difference.

Self Care is the secret ingredient to Soldier care in a recipe that yields many servings of effective leadership.

My mom and dad just loved the fact that I fooled around. They just embraced it. They'd always kind of enjoy it, and they liked it when I made them laugh.

Yoga is meant for the purification of body and its exploration as well as for the refinement of the mind.

Boxing is changing and training methods are slowly being dragged into the 21st century.

[While] the primary responsibility, as we all acknowledge, (falls) with the family, ... Our homes, our families, our children's minds are being flooded by a tide of violence.

Live every day like it is your last and learn everyday like you will live forever