George W. Bush has gathered around him upper-crust C-students who know no history or geography.

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.

There is a tragic flaw in our precious constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.

I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all the kinds of things you can't see from the center.

He didn't look like a soldier at all. He looked like a filthy flamingo.

Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae.

Perhaps I am the turtle, able to live simply anywhere, even underwater for short periods, with my home on my back.

About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.

We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Christmas is the keeping-place for memories of our innocence.

As long as you can start you are all right. The juice will come.

I know that gaps can be closed. And they can be closed substantially, more than I think we believe.

Megahertz: This is really, really big hertz.

People become depressed when they neglect their spiritual practice.

To think twice in every matter and follow the lead of others is no way to make money.

If I'm not doing anything to make a change, then I'm responsible.

What matters to me is learning and growing, and getting to do what I love to do. As long as I can do that, I'm happy.

What I really enjoy the most is seeing what the crowd likes. I enjoy making people laugh.

I just play the game. I hit a shot and wait for the next guy to hit his. I don't think between shots-that's my nature.