Give a man food, and he can eat for a day. Give a man a job, and he can only eat for 30 minutes on break.

It's true that all men are pigs. The trick is to tame one who knows how to find truffles.

In days gone by, a man's word was his bond. Today, fortunately, we have glue.

We having nothing to fear but fear itself. That, and maybe getting mugged by someone wearing a "No Fear" t-shirt.

We have nothing to fear but fear itself. That, and those great big furry spiders.

Whoever said "When in Rome, do as the Romans do", has never driven a car there.

I don't think that movies are too violent. But I do think that popcorn is too expensive, and this can often lead to violence.

Despite rumors to the contrary, a mime is actually a very satisfying thing to waste.

I've spent years trying to "get in touch with my inner child," but now my new therapist tells me it's mostly been inappropriate touching.

My coach once told me "there's no "I" in "team." I responded there's also no "I" in "hackneyed." Then I had to run 12 laps.

Love is a dance.

If you're 40 years old and you've never had a failure, you've been deprived.

Oh! Duty is an icy shadow. It will freeze you. It cannot fill the heart's sanctuary.

Hunger of the body is altogether different from the shallow, daily hunger of the belly. Those who have known this kind of hunger cannot entirely love, ever again, those who have not.

Only the supremely wise and the ignorant do not alter.

I'm not comparing Bush to Adolf Hitler - because George Bush, for one thing, is not as smart as Adolf Hitler.

I wanted to show that women are empowered and strong, and don't have to be saved by some male hero, but they can take care of themselves using their intelligence and their power.

The USA won't be competitive or fair if we don't help more families give their kids the best possible start in life.

I think women in general like men that don't give them the thing that we want. We want a chase.

A country is in a bad state, which is governed only by laws; because a thousand things occur for which laws cannot provide, and where authority ought to interpose.