Golf was my first glimpse of comedy. I was a caddy when I was a kid. I was on the golf course rather than being in lessons, but I can play better now than I could then.

People are like music, some speak the truth and others are just noise.

Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood.

Friendship is so weird. You just pick a human you've met and you're like, 'Yep, I like this one,' and you just do stuff with them.

I'm a nut, but not just a nut.

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

You know how funerals are not for the dead, they’re for the living? Bachelor parties are not for the groom, they’re for the uncommitted.

You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is flipping through photos on their phone.

Just beat my record for most consecutive days without dying.

The secret is to have a sense of yourself, your real self, your unique self. And not just once in a while, or once a day, but all through the day, the week and life.

Some of them will, but most of them are willed. Some of them are genuine, but most of them are bad actors.

It's not just enough to swing at the ball. You've got to loosen your girdle and really let the ball have it.

Education is a nation's cheapest defence

All human beings were of course unique, and they only discovered that when someone else fell in love with them or when no one ever fell in love with them.

Il n'y a de réalité que dans l'action. (There is no reality except in action.)

Undoubtedly, philosophers are in the right when they tell us that nothing is great or little otherwise than by comparison.

Don't be afraid of change, because it is leading you to a new beginning.

I'm not annoying in relationships! I'm great!

The fact that people will pay you to talk to people and travel to interesting places and write about what intrigues you, I am just amazed by that.

You make your life choices understanding that you might and do have to work harder to prove yourself.