Good manners are just a way of showing other people that we have respect for them.

My cousin is an agoraphobic homosexual, which makes it kind of hard for him to come out of the closet.

For years I thought my father was a hunchback. Turns out he didn't know suspenders were adjustable.

After God created the world, He made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from collapsing, He invented humor.

If you find a book you like on Amazon, please buy it somewhere else!

Advertising has done more to cause the social unrest of the 20th century than any other single factor.

I used to beat myself up about weight and working out, and no matter what I did I never felt good about myself. I decided to accept myself and know that I am good.

To walk safely through the maze of human life, one needs the light of wisdom and the guidance of virtue.

Keep dreaming, wishing and planning. There's immeasurable power in it.

This estrogen force field needs to dissipate... Move along. All of you. Now!

Virtue only is the true beauty.

I really love to make movies.

Love is the only game that is not called on account of darkness.