Good morning! What we have in mind is breakfast in bed for four hundred thousand.

Laughter is the valve on the pressure cooker of life. Either you laugh and suffer, or you got your beans or brains on the ceiling.

you aren't what you eat - you are what you don't poop.

We are all the same person trying to shake hands with our self.

We can make a difference and have fun doing it

Laughter is the valve on the pressure cooker of life.

we're all bozos on the bus, so might as well sit back and enjoy the ride.

Sure, I could of done it different... put my clown in a closet and dressed up in straight clothing. I could of compromised my essence, and swallowed my soul.

Death was Patrick Henry's second choice.

And I also thought that Richard Nixon was the greatest political education we have ever had, but it looks like we need to relearn them again.

Keep your sense of humor, my friend; if you don't have a sense of humor it just isn't funny anymore.

We can never untangle all the woes in other people's lives. We can't produce miracles overnight. But we can bring a cup of cool water to a thirsty soul, or a scoop of laughter to a lonely heart.

You have to watch what you eat.

I'm inconsistent because I'm human.

... my mother and father ... raised nine of us and taught each to do our best ... We tried.

Some young folks have wind-fall minds, prematurely detached from the tree of knowledge for a life-long sourness and pettiness.

Research is always a high priority in my fiction. Songs, fashion, politics, television, movies, trends - I try to get those details right.

I'd like my life to be like a Bruce Springsteen song. Just once. I know I'm not born to run, I know that Seven Sisters' Road is nothing like Thunder Road, but feelings can't be different, can they?

that's as nutty as squirrel turds

People love conversation, and movies are conversations, and an audience has to participate; it has to fill in some blanks.

The knowledge that every day there is something more to learn, something higher to reach for, something new to make for others, makes each day infinitely precious