Great things are achieved only when we take great risks.

All religions must be tolerated ... every man must go to heaven in his own way. [Die Religionen müssen alle toleriert werden ... denn hier muss ein jeder nach seiner Fasson selig werden.]

The more I see of men, the better I like my dog.

Diplomacy without military might is like music without instruments.

Great advantage is drawn from knowledge of your adversary, and when you know the measure of his intelligence and character, you can use it to play on his weakness.

Every man has a wild beast within him.

A man, who can, in cold blood, hunt and torture a poor, innocent animal, cannot feel much compassion for the distress of his own species.

The greatest and noblest pleasure which we have in this world is to discover new truths, and the next is to shake off old prejudices.

No government can exist without taxation. The money must necessarily be levied on the people; and the grand art consists of levying so as not to oppress.

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer, and the King does not believe that coffee-drinking soldiers can be relied upon to endure hardships in case of another war.

A crown is merely a hat that lets the rain in.

Just like you silly bums, I have a personal sky god. I bow to him, as you do to your airy-fairy sod. He prefers I call him Mr. NOT.

My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you - I hope she meets somebody nice.

A sermon wept over is more acceptable with God than one gloried over.

Do I pass, Dr. Saunders?

Any time you think you have the game conquered, the game will turn around and punch you right in the nose.

When someone changes your face, it's really shocking and scary.

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.

It is impossible to treat a child too well. Children are spoiled by being ignored too much or by harshness, not by kindness.

When I give, I give myself.

Dennis Cooper, God help him, is a born writer.