'Groundhog Day' was one of the greatest scripts ever written. It didn't even get nominated for an Academy Award.

People are like music, some speak the truth and others are just noise.

Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood.

Friendship is so weird. You just pick a human you've met and you're like, 'Yep, I like this one,' and you just do stuff with them.

I'm a nut, but not just a nut.

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

You know how funerals are not for the dead, they’re for the living? Bachelor parties are not for the groom, they’re for the uncommitted.

You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is flipping through photos on their phone.

Just beat my record for most consecutive days without dying.

The secret is to have a sense of yourself, your real self, your unique self. And not just once in a while, or once a day, but all through the day, the week and life.

Love never dies.

No matter how smart we may think we are, no matter how committed we are to our truth, we can lose our way.

Dear Marie Tussaud, Fake people are everywhere, you do not have to waste wax creating them

Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.

Our confidence is not in what we have, but He who freely gave us what we have. If God's will is in your little stones, they will surely bring down giant Goliaths... but you have to make the throw!

...tell them that we have some good in us, too. And the only thing worth living for is the good. That’s why we’ve got to make sure we pass it on.

No skill shapes a child's future success in school or in life more than the ability to read.

Platonic England, house of solitudes, rests in its laurels and its injured stone

Immortal mortals, mortal immortals, one living the others death and dying the others life.

Hotels are the only proper places for lecturers. When I am ill-natured I so enjoy the freedom of a hotel where I can ring up a domestic and give him a quarter and then break furniture over him.